Hiding from God

Have you ever felt a need to be your best self before God? To come as His beloved son or daughter who is spotless, stainless, bold, confident, and courageous? To always don your best behavior when you have to appear before Him?

Way to go!!

Great virtues you’ve got there. Surely, God wants us to walk worthy of the vocation wherewith we are called.

However, the problem springs up when you feel this is how you should always approach God – as a bold superman.

Thinking aloud. Do you also know that going before God with a feeling of worthiness that is coming from anything other than the finished work of Christ is self-righteousness?

What then happens when you’re broken, hurt, angry, drained, and weak?

What happens when you break God’s heart, overreact, and behave uncomely towards others?

Let me guess.

You’ll postpone going to (hide from) God until you’ve snapped back into your human super-self?

Or, you’ll try to cover up the hurt, pain, and guilt (hide your heart) with a superficial performance of holiness and sanctity?

Wait.

Please go back to the sentences in bold.

Brood over them for a few minutes until you can honestly affirm which of the two you’re most likely to do when you ‘do not look or feel like one of God’s own.’

Now, let’s talk about what happens when you take either of the routes above.

Hiding from God Until You’re Normal Again

This is about the most common route people often take when they feel they are not worthy to approach God.

You want to stay away from God, His people, and even His word until time blots out the imprints of your wrongdoings, and you feel up to the task of being God’s child again.

I understand the feeling of breaking God’s heart after all He’s done for you and all your encounters with Him. But I must warn you, this path is very dangerous.

Time doesn’t heal anything. It simply covers that hurt, guilt, and pain with the memory dust of other occurrences in your life. Only the blood of Jesus blots those out.

How will you even become worthy to approach God when you hide from Him? You definitely will not be idle all that time. What will you be doing and feasting on while you’re hiding from God? Will those things make you any better?

Secondly, the devil is dying to have you hide from God. That’s a dream come true for him because, at that point, you’ll be sitting duck for him. He may not end you or out rightly attack you. Instead, he’ll likely start by making you see more reasons why you should stray further away from God – positioning you properly for his strike!

Finally, why would you miss a single day of fellowship with God and His people because you feel you’re not worthy to approach Him? Did you even start to approach Him because you were worthy to do so?

Or did you forget that He hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in Him?

Hiding Your Heart from God

I want you to picture someone with a wound on his thighs, say, a gory bite from a wild animal. He goes home and ties that wound with a piece of designer clothing. No cleaning, no treatment.

Outwardly, he’ll appear as a rich, (maybe) handsome person. But it will only be a matter of time before that wound festers and become an entry point for infections. Soon enough, that leg might even be amputated.

Now, that is what happens when you try to hide your heart from God after a wrong. You won’t become any less His child, the supply of His grace will not diminish by an inch, but your heart will begin a journey of subtle rot. And soon enough, you may fall out of alignment or faith – in a sudden manner.

What Do You Do If You Fall Short of God’s Glory?

That you allowed bitterness (or other ungodly things) a place in your heart or that you fell into sin is no reason to hide from God or hide your heart from Him.

For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of His good pleasure.

                                                                                                                                            Phil 2:13

God is your Father. The best you can do is be His child and not conceal your emotions and wrongs from Him. He isn’t looking for your best performance. He isn’t after a flawless show from you.

He just wants you to give Him your heart. Yes, with the hurt, pain, guilt, and hatred (if you’ll permit me). When you do, He can then get out His forceps, scissors, dilator, and scalpel to begin the work of getting out the rubbish that doesn’t belong to Him and aligning your heart to His counsel.

God needs you to bring those negative emotions, those bad feelings, and those shortcomings to Him. He wants you to be vulnerable and open the depths of your heart to Him.

Cry, pray, and groan in repentance. But after those, still present yourself and your heart to God on a platter of the finished work of the cross. That’s the only time He can do thorough work on you so that you can conform to the image of Christ.

No matter what happens, do not hide from God, do not hide your heart from Him. You’ll only break His heart more when you do that.