Have you ever looked around and felt like everyone else is moving forward while you’re left behind?
People are getting married, securing their dream jobs, launching multiple businesses, and traveling the world.
You?
Feeling stuck in your little gray world, wondering what went wrong with your life. You feel like nothing significant is happening for you; maybe life has truly left you behind.
If you’ve been silently asking, “Why am I so behind in life?” or you battle anxiety, shame, and regret every time you scroll through social media, you’re not alone.
Whether you’re confronted by delayed dreams, missed opportunities, or just the overwhelming sense that you should be further ahead by now, the feeling of being behind in life is no joke.
But is it really true? Are you really behind in life?
This blog will walk you through why you feel behind in life and what you can do about it. You’ll gain practical, soul-lifting strategies to break free from comparison, overcome regret, and finally start enjoying every moment of your life.
Why You Feel Left Behind in Life
To be honest with you, there is ONE MAJOR REASON you’re feeling left behind. That reason is simply that you’re kinda paying too much attention to other people’s lives. A.k.a., you’ve stopped minding your business!
If not, how did you come about the ‘behind’? Behind what? Behind who? Before you use prepositions of position like in, under, behind, and above, there must be a reference point.
So, what’s your reference point? Whose life are you marking to draw the conclusion that you are behind?
Another reason you could be feeling behind in life is that you’re living your life to meet societal expectations. That’s why you think you are behind in life because you’re not married at 25, or you still pay rent at 45. You’re letting society rule you.
Or maybe the expectations you’re not meeting are not societal but rather your personal, preset expectations. Tell me, where did they come from? Did you set those expectations by looking inward or by fixing your gaze on external things like… people’s lives?
How to Stop Feeling Behind In Life
Pay More Attention to Your Life
As we said, the feeling of being left behind often comes when we start to pay less attention to our lives and more attention to the things happening in other people’s lives.
So, to stop that feeling of being behind in life, take your eyes off people’s lives. Unfollow them on social media if you must. Avoid those long hours of gossip about other people’s lives, no matter how harmless they sound.
Instead, choose to pay attention to your own life and the things happening in your life. Get rid of whatever reference point you’ve created in your mind and make your journey the reference.
Fix Your Identity
If your feeling of being left behind is coming from a lack of certain material possessions or accomplishments, then you need to reevaluate your sense of identity.
When you fail to grasp your identity and the true source of it, you will rely on things that do not stand the test of time for identity.
So, who are you? Whose are you? What is your life’s purpose? If you are Christian, who has God said you are? What does He call you?
Trust me, your true identity is what truly matters on your journey to becoming. When you know it, nothing will ever make you feel behind in life.
Practice Gratitude
This might hurt, but do you see that feeling of being left behind in life? It’s sometimes as a result of ingratitude. You are either not paying attention to the good happening for you, or you’ve decided they’re not even worth celebrating.
Whatever it may be for you, I put it to you that there is something good currently going on in your life. There are a ton of things you can be grateful for in your life – no matter how bad you currently have it.
This isn’t me downplaying the severity of your current circumstances. But think about it, could things possibly be worse than they are? If yes, then you surely can be grateful that they aren’t worse than they are.
Another way to practice gratitude whenever you feel behind in life is to shift your comparison reference point.
Yup.
You’ve been looking at the lives of people who seem to have it all together, right?
Now flip things around and take a peek at the lives of those who are in worse conditions than you are.
How about your high schoolmate who’s currently unemployed or even homeless? What about those who have died?
Would you feel left behind if you tried to compare yourself with people you know whose lives are in terrible shape?
See? There’s so much to be grateful for in your life. Practice that gratitude every day and at every single chance you get.
Understand God’s Metric for Success in Your Life
The yardstick God uses to measure success for each of us differs. What He calls success for you may not be success for the next person.
The best part?
That you feel someone else is more successful than you are does not in any way mean they are successful before God.
So, that person with whom you compare your life to conclude that you are behind may actually be failing based on God’s original plan for their lives.
Why not focus your attention on what God is doing in your own life? Find out what God calls success in your life. Find out what His will for you is, and walk in it every day.
And hey, that your life isn’t all glamorous now could only that you’re in a tough season. And seasons pass – especially if you make the most of them.
By the way, you wanna know what I call true success? True success is being at the center of God’s will for my life at every given time. Once I’m certain I am in God’s will for me, nothing else, absolutely nothing else matters to me.
Adopt this mindset, and you’ll never feel behind in life again!
Ditch the Expectations
Yeah, here we are. Society says once you’re done with tertiary education, the next thing should be a six-figure job, and then you tie the knot with the love of your life. Nine months after you say I do, a baby should already be crying in your home.
But you graduated from the university 10 years ago, and you’re still struggling to get that small business off the ground. You’re not even in a relationship yet. And you’re beginning to feel behind in life.
My question to you is this: who set that standard?
Did the person who set the standard create you?
Then why do you lose sleep over an imaginary standard set by society? Why do you despise your life’s journey because it does not align with a non-existent standard?
Ditch those societal expectations and run the course of your life’s journey to fulfillment!
Focus on Improving Your Life
So, maybe the actual feeling you have when you think you’re behind in life is regret or sorrow. You probably did not start when you were supposed to, or you were too sick, stressed, distracted, or discouraged to take action when you should have.
Now, everyone you know is moving ahead, and you’re not. It’s okay to acknowledge what you feel, but don’t build a nest around it. Get up and keep moving.
And hey, what if the things you want to happen to you aren’t happening yet because you’re not ready for them?
What if you’ll just end up sabotaging them because you need more preparations to handle them?
You feel you are behind because you’ve got just 12 followers? What if you’re not prepared for the backlash and criticism that might come with having 100k people voice their opinions on every move you make on social media?
What you need now is to keep improving your life. Take an audit of your life and identify where you need to focus your urgent efforts. Take this Wheel of Life Assessment for Intentional Living to know where.
When you’ve figured out where you need improvement, start to work on them right away. Take small steps every day to get to your desired destination in life.
Something else you can do to improve your life every day is to stop wasting your time and start using it purposefully. Take this Time Management Quiz to see how well you’re doing with your time and how you can start using your time purposefully.
Enjoy Your Unique Journey
I need you to understand that life is a journey, not a race. And no two persons have the same journey —or the same destination.
So, instead of worrying about being behind in life, why not focus your attention on making the most of your unique journey?
Here, take these epic confessions to boost your self-worth and see that you are enough just as you are.
